Since opening our shop, Tuesday is my Monday. This doesn't make the beginning of the week any easier. This morning, I am here and the only person I've had venture through the rain to come in is Robert (pronounced Roh-bear).
Apparently, he walked here from Groton in an attempt to get to Ithaca. I'm not great with directions but isn't that the long way? Clearly, he is lost and not quite "right." When he asks to use the phone, I let him use my cell because Dad is tying-up the phone line in the back office. Roh-bear trys to no avail to get a ride from someone. He then asks if he can call his mental health caseworker. Your MENTAL HEALTH CASEWORKER? Perfect. Just perfect. Sure why not? It's a slow day and I'm bored. He proceeds to tell someone at Mental Health that he was attempting to walk to Ithaca to get some money. Great, so he is going to rob us because he is broke. He hands the phone to me and I give the on-call caseworker directions to the shop. I feel like saying, "...And bring some money because Roh-bear has been my only "customer" today and, as he's told you, he has no money." Caseworker Sue assures me she will be here in fifteen minutes. Do I hear panic in her voice? Is there something she's not telling me? Is Roh-bear likely to rob me? Rape me or worse yet rape me AND Dad? Ugh. That's just sick and wrong. Maybe he is going to murder us? Well, Dad is here. If Roh-bear wants to rob us, rape us or murder us he'll have to go through Dad first... which will give me enough time to get out of here. While he waits for his caseworker, Roh-bear enjoys some of our granola samples. I run into the back office and tell Dad that he needs to wait one minute and then come out because there is a strange man in the store. Right on cue, Dad appears and pretends to do something at the counter. When Roh-bear asks if we have candles, I almost laugh out loud. Candle-sniffing freak. I envision Wonder Woman throwing a hammer in slow motion and the hammer, spinning slowly through the air until it whacks the perpetrator in the head. I look at Dad to see if he's telepathically picked-up on the whole Wonder Woman visual but he is just happily showing Roh-bear where the candles are. And he does sniff them. What is it with strange men and candle sniffing? Roh-bear enjoys the remainder of his granola and a bagel (courtesy of Dad who does have a humanitarian side, occasionally, and an abundance of stale bagels in the fridge.) As he gnaws on the bagel, he tells me that he was builder who now has a patent in the process for something he isn't quite able to explain. Maybe he's inhaled too many candle scents?? Dad has disappeared into the back room again. He's probably thinking, "Well, if this guys gonna rob us, he'll have to go through Shana first and I will have time to run." Moron. Roh-bear tells me that he's lost everything he ever owned and Adult Protective Services won't leave him alone. Seriously? Did he say, Adult Protective Services? Yes. Where is my hammer?
Finally, after more than fifteen minutes, Roh-bear wanders back outside and is eventually picked-up by Caseworker Sue. Crisis averted.
The only Tuesday-bright spot for me today is The Voice! Since spending an entire morning watching the new series, The Voice, on Primetime on Demand, I am hooked on it and tonight is a new episode! Yay! Never fear, Gleeks, I have not abandoned you; I still love Tuesdays for Glee, too.
Having been a faithful Idol viewer for the last several seasons, it took me a few weeks to give The Voice a chance. I wasn't a huge fan of any of their grammy-winning "coaches," Christina Aguilera, Blake Shelton, Cee Lo Green or Maroon Five's Adam Levine, so they weren't a "pull" for me. Of course, now, I've decided that Adam Levine and Blake Shelton are not only easy on the eyes but have great stage presence, a sense of humor and, for Adam, a darker, sarcastic side I really like. I am sure that this is why the biggest viewership for The Voice is female (also, the same for Idol). I just hope this doesn't mean we'll see the demise of female contestants as soon as the performers' futures fall into the hands of "America's voters," as we've seen happen repeatedly on Idol.My favorite moments on the show thus far? Easily the "blind auditions," during which the coaches are facing away from the stage and press their "I want you," buzzer to select performers for their "team" without seeing them -- but based solely on their voice. I love it when the coaches playfully compete with each other... At one point, while competing for the same contestant, Adam accused Cee Lo of "name dropping," and reached down to the floor with an exaggerated scooping movement saying, "Here, let me get that name you DROPPED. I know people, too."
So, I will make it through the rest of my day here, hopefully without anymore Candle-sniffing freaks, and then enjoy my evening at home with Blake and Adam!
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